Rejected Harry Potter Sequels

A new Harry Potter book was released! Kind of! It's about some magical thing or another, and people are maybe lining up around the world to get a glimpse at the new Enterprise, or see a different Gandalf hat, or discover how Chewbacca was branded Divergent by a sparkling vampire named after a potato.

I'm not supposed to be telling you this, but I was contacted by the powers that be to pitch the new stage play. They must have seen something they liked! Believe me, I was thrilled—a chance to work in the wizarding world of Harry Potter! That's the kind of thing that would make you make rash decisions, like buy a boat with your wife's credit card!

Sadly, after several grueling hours of desperate proposals, I was informed that my ideas were too "out there" and "poorly thought out" and "who are you and why are you in my office". But they didn't think ahead to have completely smashed my flash drive with my files on it, so now I'm going to share those titles with you! Just read them and tell me some stupid cursed child or whatever is better than these!

Also, if anyone is interested in buying a boat, I really need to sell one.

Harry Potter 01