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Welcome to the Album of Darkness!

 

Apart from being a reference to an aggressively silly (and hilarious) Sam Raimi movie, this is my collection of weird/offensive/funny photos from my various travels. They can be obtuse, to be sure, but that's half the fun!

 

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Alright, romance novels are pretty dumb to begin with. But somewhere along the line, a pattern develops. It's clear, at this point, that bored housewives are obssessed with Australians. Well, at least this is just terrifying and not ARE WE IN SYDNEY GODDAMNIT!? Um... alright. He may not be an Aussie, but we've stumbled into really uncomfortable territory here.

If it's not Australians, it's trickery or purchasing - WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!? What every fan wants: a reminder of total lack of effort. Loosely defined 'science' and threats against masculinity? Man, America has not changed much, has it? I... I don't get it.

Gah! Apparently dead-eyed children used to make people really hungry back in the day. Anyone ever play Silent Hill 4? You know what I'm getting at, then. If not... slippers, I suppose. Yup. Nothing's better for your throat than deadly carcinogens! Hello, children. We'll watch you while you sleep.

You can't read it, I'm sure, but the tag says "Sex Manual." Yup. Smut from your elders' generation! Word. Well, that's one way to cut down on costs. I JUST GOTTA DANCE ... what?

Wh... why would you like that? OH GOD, WHAT ARE YOU DOING Huh. I didn't realize God was so direct. This isn't news, Yahoo! I know you're dense, but seriously. And the award for 2013's 'Doesn't Understand Irony Award' goes to Cover Girl.

LOL A Very Private Boning, more like. Miscellaneous ear, indeed. Just in case you're dense. What makes this especially silly is that they accented their mistake. Wee!

Weirdest cropped pants I've ever seen. ... No, I'll take the chance with the non-fished eyed serial killer, thank you.

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